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Psychological Evaluation
My Personality Test (2/12/2019)
This is the second time I've ever had to take a personality test.The first time was for my doctors at the VA, so I had an idea of what to expect. It had around four hundred questions. Some of the questions were super specific like “My hobbies include archery, and stamp collecting.”
The answers you can choose from are scale style 1 being false, 2 being slightly true, 3 being mostly true, and 4 being very true. The reason I had to take this time consuming (but VERY necessary) test was for the Psychologist to review before my Psychological evaluation that will be taking place this Saturday.
I’m confident in all of my answers.I look forward to our Skype interview with the therapist to review all of my answers. Fortunately, I will have my husband by my side for support. So far something that I feel like everyone should have while on a surrogacy journey is a solid support system. Without one this whole process could be more overwhelming.
My Skype Interview (2/16/2019)
Saturday at 2pm was our scheduled Psych evaluation. I put Bradley down for a nap, and allowed Betty some screen time to keep her distracted in her room for a bit. If I could go back I would have had someone watch the children for me because unfortunately about ten minutes before the scheduled skype call Bradley wanted up, and then about 10-15 minutes into the evaluation Betty came from her room demanding milk. Fortunately the therapist that we had assigned to us was extremely understanding, and kept the session going with the kids on camera. It was pretty amazing how she was not distracted by Betty's silly faces into the webcam.
Gustav took the kids away after they started becoming overwhelming. Turns out Bradley just had a wet diaper, and Betty was just thirsty. While he was tending to the children the Therapist was able to focus on my solo questions.
I can basically break down the entire two hours into four parts. First was all about Gustav. Second was all about me. The third was about our relationship, and the fourth was our why, and how we would handle crazy situations that could come up throughout the whole surrogacy journey.
During the first part Gustav was able to tell the therapist about his whole life, and his upbringing. She seemed shocked when he told her that he was six of eight and that his parents remained married through it all.
Next was my turn ( this is when Gus was able to put the kids back in their rooms) and I honestly was a little nervous. My background is not at all the same as what Gustav's was. I was worried that my past would somehow affect my future. It did not. Not at all, so for those of you considering surrogacy don't for a second think that other people's wrongs will make your choice to become a surrogate obsolete. Heads up she did ask VERY personal questions while my husband was in the room and on camera. It was like she was making sure that we knew everything about each other. Good thing Gustav and I have no secrets, so that part was almost relieving. She asked Gus “Did you know about her entire past before you decided to marry her?” He told her “Yes I did.” That's when she started talking about our marriage.
She asked us to describe each others personalities. At first I was stumped. It took a second to find the right words to say. Once I said one word the rest started flowing.
It's a wonderful feeling hearing the love of your life describe your personality in such a positive way. He told her that I was the friend most went to when they needed to get something off of their chest, or to get advice from. He said how caring, and loving I was, and that when I set my mind to something I follow through. My negatives however were that I overthink things. He's right I definitely do.
The last thirty minutes or so we discussed how I was going to handle being a surrogate with no husband around during the weekdays. I was clear that I had a wonderful tribe of women here in town who support my decision, and are just a phone call away. Also, if something was seriously wrong Gustav has a very family friendly job, and they know if he says he needs to go home that he means it and they let him no questions asked.
When the call ended I took a deep breath and Gustav asked me if I was okay. It WAS a therapy session, and some things were brought up that we don't talk about, but I was okay. He closed the laptop, and gave me a hug.
Next step….
Getting matched!
